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The Show Up to Go Up (SUGU) Podcast is a personal development podcast that explores what it means to get out of your own way and show up for yourself to live your best life and find success - whatever that means to you. For years I've let fear hold me back but I've finally pushed past those limiting beliefs and now I want to help you do the same. I'm here to give you inspiration and information to guide you to become a better version of yourself.
Episodes
Thursday Mar 12, 2020
Show Up to Overcome Fear
Thursday Mar 12, 2020
Thursday Mar 12, 2020
Show Up to Go Up (SUGU)
Episode 2: Show Up to Overcome Fear
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FEAR - Forget everything and run OR Face everything and rise?
Have you ever feared for your life? It’s something that you can’t really explain but it is so intense and overwhelming. When you are in any kind of perceived danger fear immediately takes over. Your mind shuts off, your instincts kick it, and you usually lose control of the moment. But sometimes your perception of reality isn’t the truth.
One night a couple of years ago I experienced what it was like to fear for my life. I was in Iowa staying with my best friend, Cassidy. She had just moved into a new apartment and I wasn’t familiar with the apartment or area. One night I came home after a work meeting and walked into her apartment (this is Iowa - people don’t lock their doors!) and see a man push her out of the way! FEAR TAKES OVER! I freeze and then...I RUN FOR MY LIFE down the hall screaming bloody murder. You learn a lot about yourself in moments of extreme fear and they say you either fight or flight and I was flighting outta there! I get to the stairwell, ready to call 911, but before I do I decide to call my friend. I’m convinced she’s not going to answer (hello! She’s in the middle of getting murdered!) and... then… she answers. WHHAAATTT?! She’s as calm as a cucumber and I’m as tense as a hooker in church. After some back and forth I learned that I was on the wrong floor the entire time! Here I thought I was in danger but my perception of reality wasn’t true. I was afraid because my perception was that my friend lived on the second floor. And yet the truth was she lived on the third floor. Poor couple that I scared the crap out of! Sorry about that!
I know this is an extreme example but it’s not that different than the fears we deal with everyday. Our fears can feel so real that they seem like they’re true but most of the time they are created by us. I want you to think about your fears. I’m not talking about phobias here I’m talking about deep rooted fears. The fears that keep you up at night. For me it’s the fear of not being talented enough or good enough in general.
Is there a chance that maybe the fear you’ve been telling yourself isn’t the truth? **Maybe your perception of your fear is on the second floor but the truth is on the third floor. Earlier I talked about fight or flight when fear arises but sometimes there’s a third action and that’s to freeze. If you are feeling stuck behind a fear that feels so great that you don’t know how to overcome it I want you to pay attention because here are 5 tools to help live with and overcome your fears.
1.) Get clear on what your fears are and where they come from. Spend some time reflecting and going inward. For me it comes from my dad. He never told me I wasn’t good enough but he wanted me to be the best in everything I did, so unless it was the best, it wasn’t good enough. I carried that with me for years, but the first step was the awareness of it.
2.) Face it/them head on. Say it out loud or write it down. Go as deep as you can and be as specific as you can. Why are you afraid of this trying this new thing? What would happen if you did? Sometimes writing it down helps you to realize how illogical that fear is. If you avoid your fear you give it power, if you face it I promise it will shrink.
3.) Visualize what could go right. Fantasize about all the amazing things that could happen if you do your fear. You truly never know what it will be like until you do something.
4.) Equip yourself with necessary tools. If you are afraid to give a speech then watch other speakers or practice so that you are confident instead of fearful. Knowledge and preparation lead to confidence.
5.) Take action with your fear. Understand that some form of fear will always be there. As you grow, new fears will come because growth happens outside of the comfort zone and in the unknown. Elizabeth Gilbert, who wrote Big Magic and Eat Pray Love talks about when she starts anything new and scary, such as writing a new book, she thinks about going on a road trip. She tells her fear that her and creativity are going on an adventure and she welcomes fear to join the adventure but she clearly lets her fear know it will not be involved in any of the decision making. Only her and creativity are allowed to do so. Give space to your fear but don’t let it make the decisions. You are not defined by your fears. You are the driver of you life!
You can do this! Don't just read these tips and forget about them. Actually take time to apply them. Doing these things changed my life! This blog and podcast wouldn't be here if I didn't apply them. You have to do the work. It's not always easy but it's so worth it. Everything you've ever wanted is on the other side of fear! Face Everything And Rise!
My letter to fear - https://www.showuptogoup.com/letter-to-fear
Helpful link on overcoming fear - https://www.jackcanfield.com/blog/overcoming-fear/
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